


the bomb

by uttergarbo



Category: New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: Alternate Universe - Non-Despair (Dangan Ronpa), Anxiety, Bento box lunch, Fluff, Kirumi best maid mom, Love Confessions, M/M, Yes all the cheesy things ok
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-08
Updated: 2018-12-08
Packaged: 2019-09-14 01:13:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,194
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16903305
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/uttergarbo/pseuds/uttergarbo
Summary: Kokichi, tired of tip-toeing around becoming boyfriends with Shuichi, longs to make things official. He knows it's time to drop the L-bomb. Unfortunately, the spoken and honest confession isn't his style. Instead, he seizes the perfect opportunity while eavesdropping on a conversation between classmates, and formulates a plan. But before he can act... he needs the help of the Ultimate Maid first.





	the bomb

**Author's Note:**

> i am still alive, somehow.
> 
> predictably, this is just a fluffy, self-indulgent one shot. i've had this idea for a while... i might do some more one-shots like this, i think they're very fun. anyway sorry this is so cheesy and silly, hope you enjoy!

Kokichi Ouma likes to stay informed. It goes hand-in-hand with his paranoia, his desire to always be three steps ahead. Snooping was apart of his life now. It was as impulsive and natural as an instinct an animal develops after years of evolution, and it was almost never right of Kokichi to do. He knew that… but sometimes, being extra nosy helped him in unexpected ways.

 

Eavesdropping. The perfect past time for the supreme leader of evil, right? He was in the school library one afternoon, pretending to look for a certain book, like normal classmates do. Halfway between pages he was barely reading, he was really listening in on whatever he could.

 

A sharp gasp catches his attention, and his eyes shift up. Through the empty space on the bookcase he can spy Shuichi giving Kaede some kind of gift, thin and wrapped nicely. Kokichi absolutely despises the curdling, rotting feeling inside his chest, and the jealous thoughts in his head. _That’s not healthy,_ Kokichi chides himself mentally. Nonetheless, he continues listening in.

 

“Saihara-kun! I can’t believe you got me this… There’s so many songs in here! It’ll get so much use from me.” Ah. So what from Kokichi could gather in those seconds, it was a musical book made for pianists. _Tch, and of course Saihara-chan gives the perfect gift, too._

 

“It’s no problem… I know you probably have played all of these before.” He hears Shuichi chuckle shyly.

 

“No, no! I really do love it. Thank you again.” He can practically feel Kaede’s smile through her voice. “You’re always giving people gifts, Saihara-kun. That just shows your thoughtfulness towards your friends!”

 

Shuichi’s too modest for his own good. “A-ahaha… I don’t do it that much but..”

 

“Hey, it’s true! You’re always doing nice things. Do you ever get anything in return?” Kaede asks, crossing her arms.

 

“Um, not often, but that’s not what I do it for. I just like… to do what I can to make my friends happy. You, Momota-kun, Harukawa-chan, and so many others have helped me a lot since I’ve been here…”

 

Kokichi places the book back in its place. An idea pops into his head, so he makes his way out of the library casually. So, his beloved Saihara-chan doesn’t receive many gifts, huh? Well… maybe that could change.

 

\--

 

For a couple months now, Shuichi and Kokichi had been dancing carefully together around the subject of becoming boyfriends. Shuichi, due to his shyness, and Kokichi, due to his… Kokichi-ness. They had flirted, shared a few kisses and sweet embraces, but he wasn’t sure any of that was official. He always told himself it was possible Shuichi wanted a casual thing. After all, he was attractive, surely Kokichi wasn’t the only one in the academy who had a crush on him. Neither of them had said the magic words. And Kokichi definitely wasn’t going to be the first to do it.

 

Well. At least that’s what he always told himself.

 

Since that day of eavesdropping, Kokichi went to Kirumi to help with his mission. Of course, he knew that her duty as the Ultimate Maid meant she wouldn’t be able to turn down his request: to teach him how to cook a good lunch.

 

That was convenient, but what wasn’t convenient was Kirumi’s curiosity. It would be way too embarrassing for him to admit _I’m trying to learn to cook so I can bag Shuichi as my boyfriend._ Not only would he rather roll over cold and dead than admit that, but Kirumi might go off on a lecture about how cooking isn’t the only important thing in a relationship, about communication and trust and blah blah blah blah. He doesn’t want to think about that stuff. He just wants to impress Shuichi.

 

So, obviously, when Kirumi asks him why he wants to learn… he just lies.

 

“Well, I shouldn’t be telling you this, Tojou-chan but... “ He leans in to whisper while she continues to prep the food. “As the supreme leader of evil, I’m actually trying to cook a good meal so I can poison one of my enemies. The tastier it is, the less likely they’ll taste the high potency toxins I’ll be killing them with!”

 

Kirumi pauses. “...Ouma-kun, please tell me that’s a joke.”

 

Kokichi sighs. “Fine, you caught me. It’s a lie. I really just wanna be able to cook for myself.” It was still not the truth but… It was believable enough, right? After all, cooking was a good life skill in general.

 

“I see... Well, Ouma-kun, you specifically asked for my assistance in making a bento box lunch, right? I should warn you that takes a considerable amount of preparation and can be difficult for a beginner. If you’d like, I could show you--”

 

“Nuh-uh! I know what I said and I know it won’t be easy. But I really wanna learn this specifically, so c’mon! Bento box! Bento box! Bento box!” He chants, hoping to end her questioning by annoying her.

 

It works like a charm. “Ouma-kun, please. I’d be happy to show you, but you have to calm down and pay attention. I can’t do this unless you can do that as well.”

 

Kokichi straightens up, beaming. “Yay! I’m ready to learn, mom!”

 

“...I would like if you refrained from calling me that.”

 

\--

 

It turns out that even with the guidance and patience of the Ultimate Maid, learning to cook takes time. It had been a couple weeks now, and Kokichi was losing his patience. Every night, when most of his classmates were in their dorms about to sleep, Kirumi and Kokichi would be in the school kitchen, practicing the art of bento box lunches. A few people had walked in on them so far, but Kokichi would immediately mess with or annoy said person until they left. His biggest fear was Shuichi seeing it, but he was trying not to let his paranoia get to him. _It’s just a fucking lunch, Kokichi, how incriminating can that be?_

 

It was considerably late at night one evening while Kokichi was laser-focused on organizing food inside the box. Making the meal tasty was one thing, but presenting it in a cute way was another. Kirumi watches him curiously, knowing he’s putting way too much attention into this.

 

“Ouma-kun, are you really just doing this for yourself?” She asks doubtfully. Kokichi’s finger twitches and the egg slice he was about to place drops on the cold floor.

 

“Psshh. Yes, I already told you, Tojou-chan.” He chides in a tone like it’s the most obvious thing in this universe. “I’m the ultimate leader of evil, so I deserve only the most ultimate of things. The most ultimate of lunches too!” He regains his composure and flashes a grin back at her. “Besides… would I lie to you?”

 

Kirumi doesn’t respond and just watches as Kokichi puts the rest of it together. He replaces the egg with a fresh one. By the time it’s done, the leader realizes he’s done a… good job. It looks surprisingly close to what Kirumi had demonstrated the first time, professional and pretty.

 

“Excellent work, Ouma-kun. I feel as though I’ve accomplished my task. You’ve learned quite a lot.” She praises, happy for the both of them.

 

“Nishishi~ you’re right, I’m awesome at this! Now I can kill my enemies in style!”

 

“You already admitted that was a lie before, Ouma-kun…”

 

“Oh, whoops.” Kokichi pops a bite of rice in this mouth.

 

“Before we end our sessions together, I have one more piece of advice to give you.” Kirumi suddenly says, which catches the leader’s attention. He raises an eyebrow, still chomping on his food. They make eye contact, and Kirumi leans in. Quietly, she adds, “A handwritten note will pair beautifully with this gift.”

 

Kokichi nearly chokes. He decides to laugh it off. “Silly Toujou-chan, I already told you this is for me and me only! Are you deaf or something?”

 

“Yes, I’m aware.” She remarks, a knowing look in her eyes. Kokichi tries not to let his nervousness show as the maid cleans up after their mess. She would have no reason to tell anyone, right? But, just in case…

 

“Anyway, Ouma-kun, If you feel competent in this matter now, then I’m afraid I must be going. It’s rather late. You should make sure to get some rest too.”

 

“Actually-- wait, Tojou-chan. I have… one more thing to request.”

 

“Yes?” She stills, waiting on him to speak.

 

He swallows dryly, hating himself right now. “This never happened, mkay?”

 

Kirumi pauses, and then nods. “Understood.” Kokichi studies her, but he sees no signs of deception. Well, only time could tell. Relief still lifts the weight off his shoulders, and he switches back up to his playful self.

 

“And now I’m gonna go stuff my face with the rest of this homemade lunch, like I deserve! See ya later, maid mom!” He beams, scooping up the bento box and seeing a small amount of disappointment in Kirumi’s eyes from the nickname. He expects her to lecture him as he begins to walk away, but instead, what he hears is soft and sincere.

 

“Goodnight, Ouma-kun, and good luck.”

 

\--

 

The next day is the fateful day. Kokichi usually doesn’t get good sleep to begin with, but when he’s stressed or anxious, it’s always worse. He had been stirring in his sleep all night, thinking of all the possibilities. In some of the scenarios playing out in his mind, he imagines Shuichi laughing at his gift, thinking it’s a joke. Or maybe sharing it with his friends, saying ‘ _Can you believe this? Ouma-kun gave me lunch with a love note like some anime girl.’_ Then, they’d all laugh about it for months and months, bringing it up to humiliate him time and time again.

 

That was the paranoid part of his brain talking. The rational part of him insists that Shuichi isn’t that needlessly cruel. Nobody is. Then the paranoid part chips in again, thinking: _well, maybe that’s what YOU think, but that’s actually who he is deep down._

 

Ugh, the back and forth… it’s nonstop.

 

In the end, he knew that the only choice was to go through with it. He had spent a lot of time with Kirumi learning this specifically, and to waste that time wouldn’t be like him. _Just grow a pair, Kokichi, and fucking go through with it!_

 

The love note itself took too many drafts to count. There was the cold version, the spilling-his-guts version, the touchy-feely version, the sarcastic version… so many switches in tone, and nothing felt right! He wishes he had asked for advice with this too, but he knew he would have been too embarrassed to do that. Kokichi sighs at his desk, glancing at the bin full of crumpled-up love notes. _What would Shuichi want?_

 

He thought about them and their relationship. He thought about the times Shuichi had been the happiest and most comfortable when he was with him. Sunlight shines in his room, illuminating him and his work space. For a moment, the brightness annoys him- but suddenly, a memory floods his mind.

 

It was a few weeks prior. The sun was setting in the distance, and Kokichi was on the rooftop, relaxing. It was a safe place he liked to go whenever he could. Sometimes, since it was usually so isolated, he’d call up someone from DICE to catch up. Shuichi found him that day and they had sat down, chatting for a while. They shared jokes and glances at the sunset… and of course, glances at each other. He remembers Shuichi’s smile that night before he left, warm and welcoming. He remembers what he said.

 

“I like spending time with you, Ouma-kun. I like… when you’re you. Really you.” Shuichi had gently placed his palm near Kokichi’s. “You know… being vulnerable isn’t a sign of weakness, right?”

 

At the time Kokichi had laughed, trying to shake off the realization he was catching feelings for this boy. The sincerity of Shuichi’s words had made him run off. Now that he thought about it, the memory causes him to blush. Shuichi always appreciates when Kokichi was slightly more vulnerable. Slightly more honest. The thought of communicating in such a cheesy way was nearly nauseating for Kokichi. But that smile…

 

 _Ugh. God damn it, love._ Kokichi winces as the pen drifts over the top of the paper again. He starts writing, telling himself not to throw this one away.

  
-

_Saihara-chan, I like you a lot. Actually, I love you. That’s not a lie!_

_I mean, you’re a detective, do I really need to spell this out for you? Fine..._

**_D-A-T-E  ❤  M-E!!!_ **

_Also, this lunch is laced with all kinds of drugs and toxins, but you’ll have to find out where I put them. Have fun!_

_Xoxo,_

_Supreme Leader of all Evil_

-

As he ends his dumb signature, he drops the sparkly purple pen on the desk, his hand trembling pathetically. There was no bigger impulse than to rip this piece of paper to shreds. Even better - burn it, that way, it could never exist again.

 

 _That’s not the right thing to go about this though._ He promised himself he’d just do it. Kokichi sighs again in an attempt to calm himself. _Just get it over with._ Even if Shuichi doesn’t feel the same, realistically, he won’t be mean about it. Realistically. He’s a nice person. Worst comes to worst, he can laugh and pretend like it was all one big lie. A prank.

 

Yep, that always works.

 

\--

 

_You’re not nervous. You’re not nervous. You’re not nervous._

 

Kokichi swears that if he lies to himself enough, it may just become true.

 

Funny enough, just like how his whole plan had begun, Kokichi found himself standing in the library again. He was also hiding behind bookshelves again, but not because he was planning to eavesdrop today. Behind him he was holding the gift, freshly prepared early that morning in the kitchen, wrapped in navy blue fabric with a gold ribbon. The materials he had stolen, of course, from Tsumugi’s lab. (Which was the perfect place to steal from, as it turns out!) The colors were only fitting for his crush, and hopefully soon, his boyfriend.

 

He takes a peek from behind the shelf, and spies his target only a short distance away. There he was, sitting merely a few feet from where Kokichi hides. The detective’s attention was nowhere except inside the book he was reading. _Bet it’s another mystery novel_ . Kokichi quietly takes the moment to admire how his bangs fall down the sides of his profile, like silky dark waterfalls. He can’t see his face since Shuichi’s back is to him, but from this angle, he can see his eyelashes quickly bat up and down every minute or so. _They’re so long, god damn,_ Kokichi thinks to himself with infatuation.

 

Then he snaps himself out of it. _Stop with the googly eyes, this is your chance!_ He scans the area, and there’s no one else in the library that Kokichi can see, and he’s thankful for that. Maybe there had been a mix-up and he was really the Ultimate Lucky student instead. He thinks for a moment on how to approach Shuichi, but he doesn’t want to waste too much time.

 

Quiet like a shark swimming up to its prey, he walks slowly behind Shuichi. Then he quickly takes the bagged lunch and taps it on top of his crush’s head, gently but enough to make contact. Shuichi’s little strand of hair that never settles rolls a little under its weight. “Bonk! Guess who.” Kokichi chimes.

 

“Ah--!” It clearly startles Shuichi and he jumps a little. He knows who it is though, and takes his gaze away from the book and towards Kokichi. He smiles softly when they make eye contact. “Oh, hey, Ouma-kun. Why did you… what’d you tap me with?”

 

Kokichi pouts, holding the lunch close. “How mean, Saihara-chan… Only a ‘hey’ and then straight to the questioning? No small talk? No bringing up the weather?!”

 

Shuichi chuckles. “You caught me off-guard.” His gaze settles on what Kokichi is holding, and the leader’s heart twists when he sees the way his eyes widen. “W-wait, is that--?”

 

“A bomb?! Yes! I’m glad you asked, I’ve been trying to get rid of it!” Kokichi acts like he’s suddenly panicking and shoves the gift right in Shuichi’s arms. It’s not that hard to pretend since his hands are shaking anyway. Shuichi simply becomes frozen in surprise and confusion. _Yes, stay like that!_ Kokichi is incredibly anxious in an uncharacteristic way, but he can’t let Shuichi know he feels something so vulnerable. So of course, he just makes a distracting scene instead.

 

“Get rid of it! IT’S GONNA BLOW!!” Kokichi screams at Shuichi before running at full speed away from the so-called ‘bomb’ - but more realistically, away from his crush. He doesn’t hear a response from Shuichi as he makes a mad dash back to his dorm. Hopefully, Shuichi will just remain a frozen statue inside the library for all of eternity, and Kokichi won’t have to face the cold, inevitable slap of rejection.

 

\--

 

It’s been a little over 24 hours since Kokichi had dropped the bomb on Shuichi.

 

In that time Kokichi desperately tried to occupy his time with random things, hobbies he would usually enjoy. Making all those lunches with Kirumi at night meant he had been losing opportunity after opportunity to prank people! He couldn’t get into the spirit like usual though. His thoughts were somewhere else, in Shuichi land.

 

He couldn’t help himself -- since the bomb, he had been avoiding him. If he hadn’t thought to do that, then he was pretty sure Shuichi would have already talked to him today. Still, every time Kokichi had caught a glimpse of him out of his eye, or spotted his shadow coming down the hall, he made a run for it. It would be kind of fun if it wasn’t so stupid.

 

Apparently, Shuichi had caught onto his game, though. A few hours ago he got the text, his name listed in Kokichi’s contact reading:

 

_**Shumai❤:** I know you’re avoiding me, Ouma-kun. I really want to talk to you. Please, meet me in the courtyard at 17:00? _

 

Kokichi meant to respond. Really, he did, but in the end he grew frustrated at himself overthinking every word he was typing, resulting in him giving up. He sighs as he sits in the courtyard, regretting this. _Saihara-chan’s on his way now, to let me down gently, I bet._ Kokichi runs his hands through his hair as he sits at one of the picnic tables, glancing around. While he hopes more than anything Shuichi has the same feelings, it won’t be a shocker if he doesn’t. _I’m manipulative, and jealous, and distant. There’s not many good reasons to date me._

 

He tries to quiet down those thoughts, thinking about anything but the current situation. Kokichi tilts his head up, admiring the hanging columns of lavender above this area of the courtyard. It was a raised section covered by a small awning, the top of it sprouting moss with the flowers. The color reminds him he should maybe re-dye his hair--

 

“Ouma-kun!” His chest tightens as he hears that familiar and lovely voice, interrupting his bland thoughts. Everything else around him vanishes as he turns his back, watching Shuichi approach him quickly. _Well, definitely too late to run away now._

 

Shuichi has a smile on his face as he continues. “...You came. I was worried you wouldn’t since you didn’t...reply.”

 

Kokichi feels guilt pricking his heart, tiny little thorns stabbing him. He feigns nonchalance and shrugs. “Sorry Saihara-chan, but I’m a very busy supreme leader. It takes a lot of time and energy to think of new fun ways to be evil.”

 

He doesn’t blink as Shuichi moves to sit right next to him. “That’s alright, I know.” The detective sighs, rolling along with the other’s lie. “I think you know why I want to talk, right?”

 

“Oh, yes!” Kokichi pipes up, forcing a smile on his face. “You wanted to thank me, for letting you know there was a bomb in the academy… by putting it in your lap!” He ignores the nervous sweat he feels on his back and hands. He continues along with the charade. “Phew, I’m glad you took care of that, Saihara-chan! When I heard that thing ticking, I knew I had to put it in good, capable hands. If it weren’t for you, we’d all be--”

 

His voice dies, his throat is dry, because _wait oh shit Shuichi is leaning in._

 

Before he can process any of this, Kokichi feels Shuichi’s lips on his, and he sees his pretty eyelids closing next to the other’s. Still nervous, Kokichi allows himself to close his eyes too. He savors this moment, his body still until he feels Shuichi’s arms around him, pulling him closer. The kiss deepens a little bit, making both their faces grow warm.

 

When they pull apart, Kokichi feels like he’s the statue now, frozen in confusion.

“You don’t have to lie your way out of it, Kokichi. I love you too.”

 

 _Kokichi._ That’s the first time he’s heard Shuichi say that. He blinks, once, twice. He stares at the detective for so long that Shuichi laughs quietly. He’s still a little shy, so he breaks eye contact, his golden eyes staring at the floor. Kokichi realizes he’s blushing, feeling even more shock because of that. “I really enjoyed that lunch… It was delicious and so unexpected. It made me really happy! Um, especially the note, of course. I really wanted to tell you how I felt as soon as possible but…” Shuichi glances back up at him. Kokichi just feels so weak.

 

“I’m impressed, Shuichi.” Kokichi decides to say, piquing his love’s interest. “You’ve survived both a bomb and a poisonous lunch within the past day. I guess you are worthy of being my partner in crime.”

 

“Well, I can’t do that…” Shuichi nearly chuckles again. “But I can be your partner in life.”

 

“Hmm.” Kokichi pretends to think, biting down on his lip. “I guess that works.”

 

Impatient, this time Kokichi is the one that leans in for a kiss. It lasts longer, and they remain in each other’s hold for a while. Usually the thought of doing such intimate things in a public setting was gross to Kokichi, but with Shuichi close and warm and loving like he was, he didn’t even care.

 

“Oh, um, Kokichi?”

 

“Mmm?”

 

“The next time you give me-- or anyone-- a gift… please don’t pretend it’s an actual live bomb.”

 

Kokichi just laughs. Shuichi pouts, continuing. “Really, you scared me--!”

 

“Hey, just be glad you haven’t experienced total organ failure from all the terrible things I definitely put in your food. I guess I didn’t use enough.”

 

Shuichi shakes his head. “Tojou-chan taught you how to cook, but she didn’t teach you how to actually give a gift…” He muses, almost to himself.

 

Kokichi’s heart just about stops. He bursts into hysterics, too overwhelmed to pretend not to care. “What?! She promised she-- Ugh, damn it, maid mom!”

 

Shuichi smiles wide. It’s almost smug- scratch that, it’s definitely smug. “She didn’t have to tell me anything. I noticed you sneaking back and forth in the kitchen at night, then when I asked her, she acted strange, like she couldn’t talk about it.” He leans in a little. “So I’m guessing you requested that too, right?”

 

 _Damn it… nail on the head. Ultimate Detectives are the worst._ It was Kokichi’s turn to pout now. He just stares up at Shuichi, a defiant and red look on his face. When he doesn’t talk, Shuichi just presses a kiss on his cheek.

 

“But, honestly, that was the most flattering thing of all. Not only were you courageous enough to tell me how you really feel… you were bold and patient enough to spend time learning something. Just for me.” Shuichi is smiling so bright, it just might burn a hole through the darkness of Kokichi. “That means the world to me.”

 

“Yeah, yeah, I’m the best most ultimate boyfriend, I get it, Shumai. Don’t go snooping around again though, or you’ll be executed by my crew.” Kokichi mumbles, just burying his face into Shuichi’s chest now. It was easy to tell he was simply dying from the affection he was receiving, not used to such an incredible amount of… feelings.

 

The sky starts to grow dim as Shuichi cards his fingers through his - now boyfriend’s - hair.  Kokichi relaxes into the touch. Anyone else even tries to get their hand near his hair is dead to him, but Shuichi is an exception. Shuichi, really, is always the exception. Kokichi closes his eyes, trying to breathe gently, but his heart still pounding with excitement.

 

“I guess I owe maid mom now, for helping me seduce you.”

 

“Yeah, maybe.” Shuichi hums, rolling lavender locks between his thin fingers. “For one… you can stop calling her ‘maid mom’.”

 

Kokichi snorts. “A fair trade-off, definitely.”


End file.
